Episode Details

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In this episode, I’m talking about how I have personally learned to manage my anxiety, self-doubt, and panic. It’s important to remember that for many of us—including myself—some of these habits and programmed behaviors will likely never be completely removed. As a result, management and knowing how to get perspective is incredibly important, as it sets the tone for the way you deal with every situation from here on out.

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Episode Transcript

[00:00:01] Clément: Hello there and welcome to another episode of whatever the hell this show is. I’m going through a rebrand right now, and I don’t know what it’s going to be called by the time this episode airs, but it’s whatever it says on the graphics or the cover for this episode. So thanks for tuning in. I appreciate it.

Um, What I want to do on this episode. Oh. And by the way, I’m in my buddy’s place. We are working together closely this week. You can see the Christmas trees here. He’s upstairs right now, recording another podcast episode. He runs a podcast called the block hash. It’s a really cool podcast. If you’re interested in anything to do with blockchain crypto, that.

Check it out really, really good podcast, highly recommended. It’s called the block hash. Now, what I want to talk to you about today is something that I feel I’m very, I’m very educated about because I’ve dealt with this for a lot of my life. Now I’m talking about anxiety. I recently published something [00:01:00] on my Instagram or the unleash love Instagram about whether people suffer from anxiety and panic attacks.

And I got a huge response. That was overwhelmingly in favor of yes, we do suffer from these attacks, which is it’s awful. It’s true. And I also suffer from them too. I suffer from social anxiety. So it’s a specific type of anxiety. It’s not an anxiety that you feel when you, uh, you’re too hard on yourself and you feel like other people are gonna notice that you you’re you’re, you’re not what you appear to be.

And it’s, uh, it’s your deepest fear is that people will find out that you can’t do what you said you would be able to do. Aren’t going to live up to the expectations. That’s probably a better way to describe it, but it’s a type of anxiety. And I have my attacks. I have my, I have my situations where, you know, emotionally, mentally, um, very [00:02:00] disempowered and I’m overwhelmed by that, that fear, uh, You know, things are gonna go south quickly, but I get through it and get through it every time.

And there’s a few things, things that I can implement or employ to get me there. And I want to share some of those things with you, because I think they apply to, you know, people who are also having just, you know, any other, uh, uncategorized type of anxiety or panic attack. It’s a terrible experience to go through.

You feel very helpless and you feel very vulnerable and. My listeners to be empowered, to live a higher quality life. And that means being confident, having control, right? Mentally, emotionally, physically being in control. I’ve never liked to be out of control. That’s why I’ve never really liked taking hard drugs.

I was addicted to alcohol and I was out of control a [00:03:00] lot when I was addicted to alcohol. But you know, it was a familiar kind of feeling. There’s a very clear line that you cross when you’re drinking, where you lose control. And I. Most of the time, uh, especially towards the end, I was quite a functioning alcoholic, so it’s a different type of addiction.

Um, and I’ve, I’ve never liked to feel like I’m out of control. Uh, so I think most of you must be, or at least I hope you would feel the same way. Now when you feel these anxiety attacks, when you have these kinds of situations where, uh, you’re overwhelmed with emotion, with feeling with fear, I think the most important thing that we can do is relax.

Okay. Now it’s difficult. It’s difficult because you have this idea in your mind that it’s just going to get worse and worse and worse, and you really have to take action now. And the clock’s ticking and that’s where the [00:04:00] desperation comes in. Now. Desperation is a tricky one. The only cure for desperate.

Is to relax. Right? So if you don’t like that, feeling that, that intensity, uh, the sweating, perhaps the reading of the skin or whatever you feel, when you get anxious, the heart rate, the, the, the, the, the, the uncontrollable thought patterns you have to be self-aware enough. Okay. So have a conversation with yourself maybe now, or after this episode, have a heart to heart.

Get. On a process. And I’m starting at the beginning of this process for you, which is the things that I do to overcome anything that I experienced like this, the first part is to relax. Now you’re in the middle of this emotional whirlwind and it doesn’t feel good and you’re terrified is going to get worse.

And you’re terrified that people are gonna, you know, I don’t know, judge, you. [00:05:00] All right. Are you terrified? You’re gonna have a heart attack or whatever’s going through your mind, but you, you must recognize it’s not gonna get better if you resist it, it’s gonna get worse if you resist it. That’s how this works.

So the only way through this is to relax. Now, you can only do that if you’re self-aware. So that’s why you need to have that conversation with yourself. You have to first set some ground rules. Okay. When I have my next attack, if I have my next attack, but you know, it’s just say, when you have my next attack, what do I need to do?

What is the step process that I’m going to agree to in order to quickly get through it and move on? Right? Because the most important thing is to let it pass as fast as. So that you can get back on your feet and you can do whatever it is that you were planning on doing. Uh, in my case, it’s very, very time sensitive because my [00:06:00] anxiety is a social anxiety, which has felt when I’m in the presence of people that I think are judged, judging me, you know, in one way or another, whether it’s actively or passively judging me.

And, um, for me to be able to operate properly, I have to have this conversation. Intimately. And immediately once I feel any kind of anxiety coming on, so it looks like this. Okay. I’m feeling a little anxious right now. I’m starting to feel that I’m losing the control of my, uh, of my, uh, my emotions. I am starting to believe this lie that I’m not.

And I need to get control and I recognize, and I’ve had this conversation with myself many times and I recognized that the only way to get control is to relax is to relax. Now I can still pay attention to someone. I can still be in the moment. I can still be in a [00:07:00] presentation and relax. The question is, how self-aware are you?

How self-aware can you. When you having these attacks so that you are always able to steer yourself in the right direction, without that self-awareness, it’s almost impossible. So. How do you get self-aware? I mean, that’s another question. That’s a whole boatload of content. All right. And, um, I would say that I I’m working on it just like everybody else.

If you have 100% self-awareness I think that’s what they call being enlightened. That’s a monk or some kind of guru. Uh, it’s not easy, but just the, the ability to notice when you’re feeling different. Is exactly what you need to be able to implement the set of [00:08:00] tools and this process to be able to get through it.

Okay. So I noticed that I’m feeling overwhelmed. I noticed that my emotional state is changing. I noticed that I’m getting anxious. What do I do? I breathe? I remember to breathe. I breathe in deep and every that’s slowly. I start to slow my thoughts. That’s one of the most important things, slowing your thoughts down because your thoughts are going a hundred miles an hour, a thousand miles an hour.

They’re searching for whatever it is that you’re scared of. Right. Other people’s judgment. What your behaviors like, can they, are they spotting that you’re a fake, right? This is what’s going through. And so you have to slow those thoughts down. You have to gently caress the thoughts for lack of a better expression.

You have to be gentle with your consciousness. [00:09:00] Um, and the more gentle you are and the more patient you are, the easier it is for you to slide out of. Terrible place and avoid, you know, the situation worsening, the intensity of that feeling, you know, growing, um, and it takes practice. Right? This is another thing that I think I need to mention is that this is a process, right?

It’s not going to be easy immediately. If this is something that you’re hearing for the first time, then, um, you’re going to need to practice. And we shouldn’t be scared of failing or of not doing things effectively because it’s all a learning curve and, you know, worst case scenario, right. You’re going to feel awful for awhile, worst case scenario.

Okay. Someone’s going to know that you have some kind of social anxiety or an anxiety or [00:10:00] depression or whatever it is that you’re going through. That’s the worst case scenario, but, you know, give people. Uh, the benefit of the doubt that they recognize we’re all human, right? We go through things we’re learning.

We all have unique backgrounds and upbringings and traumas and all of that. So I would say, believe that no matter what happens, you’re going to be all right. That’s a really important way to be able to craft this skill of first. Recognizing when it’s happening. Second of all, calming your mind, calming your body, breathing, regulating things, getting back to center again.

That’s what it’s all about. And when you’re there. Okay. When you finally got back control, the way that you move forward is you focus like you met. On the present moment [00:11:00] what’s happening right now. Who’s talking to you. What’s happening around you, focused on the moment, focus on the things that are happening and don’t think about the future.

Stop yourself, avoid thinking about the future, the past. Avoid thinking about yourself so much. Focus on what’s happening around you. And, you know, there’s tricks to do this. I mean, if you’re not in a position where you have to respond to people or be, um, in an active discussion, if it’s more of a passive kind of anxiety where you’re on a bus or something, and you just, all of a sudden become overwhelmed with this, there are tricks that you can do.

Like for example, one of them, which is quite effective is to, uh, look for a. Sight sound, smell, and a taste. All right. It’s just the, the, the, the, the, [00:12:00] the sensory experience, um, and, and focusing on things that you can tie to a sensory experience in your surrounding, and that breaks you out of that mental process or that mental almost like cycle.

Again, coming back to it. It’s just really important to focus on this present moment, meditate. You can practice meditation, you know, even when you’re not having these kinds of episodes, you can meditate when you’re alone, you can meditate when you’re with other people, you can do it anywhere at home.

You can do it from work. You can do it in the airport. You gotta be aware of these. And you’ve got to practice them and you’ve got to come. You know, you’ve got to communicate with yourself. You’ve got to tell yourself, look, and the next time this happens, here’s the process. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. First you gotta be self-aware self-aware to the point where you’re recognizing your state of mind, your state, your body, your bodily state is changing and you have to get control.

How do you get control? You’ve got to calm [00:13:00] down. You’re going to slow your heartbeat, slow your thought patterns. Not in that order. I think the thought patterns come first because the thought patterns are what making your heart race there. Want to making your. Trigger there. What, uh, making your body, um, start to manifest this, uh, fight or flight response.

So you’ve got to slow your thoughts, slow your heartbeat, slow your bodily rhythm, your pattern. Start to focus, focus on the present moment. Focus on what’s happening around you. Use any kind of tricks or tools that you have available to make that process easier. And once you gear in, give yourself some credit command yourself, congratulate yourself.

Congratulate yourself, or you can save verbally. Look if you’re, again, if you’re in a position where, you know, you’re not, you’re not in the middle of a conversation, you’re not with other people, commend yourself, tell yourself, congratulations. Well done. And I did it. I was able to get back control. And then from [00:14:00] there, you know, you’re back to center, you’re back on track again, and you’ve got that confidence, right?

So that’s the idea is that you building this. On the back of your ability to get, to come to center. So let me recap for you, because I think this is really, really important. First is a self-awareness and you do that by really having a conversation with yourself and setting some rules for when the next time this happens.

You’re going to go through a process first recognize when it’s happening. Second Start to slow your mind, your thoughts and your heart rate, because that is going to intensify as your thoughts, start to have this, um, reinforcing effect, right? So you need to slow that down. And the only way you can do that is by being patient and being calm and [00:15:00] accepting the situation and not resisting.

You’re slowing your body. You’re slowing your rhythm. You’re bringing your wavelength to a higher level. Right? Higher is better. Lower is kind of, I guess, in terms of spirituality, in terms of consciousness, a higher frequency is a more, uh, is a more, let’s say enlightened frequency. So you’re kind of being patient with yourself, being calm, breathing.

Bringing back your control once you’ve got it, recognize it, congratulate yourself for it. All right. Build some confidence on my God. I was able to do this. Great. Okay. I got it back. I’m in control again. And from there you can continue. And I think the more times that you’re able to do this, The better you get it.

And that’s really what is something that I focus on. That’s really how I deal with my kinds of anxiety that I [00:16:00] feel on a regular basis. I would say I feel it pretty much daily. It’s unfortunate, but it’s true. And it’s one of the things that I have to deal with. And until I’m able to get rid of it completely, I think these are the kinds of things that I’m going to be implementing.

And I’ll be constantly looking for new ways, but it works for me. Hopefully it works for you. I hope that you found. Valuable and interesting. And I will be doing something in the same vein, something that will be practical, something that people can relate to, that you can relate to on my next episode. So remember to tune in and I hope you have an amazing rest of the week.

Take care.